Friday, December 21, 2012

End of Days

With the impending apocalypse, I thought I check with the dear folks at The Rapture Index to get their take on it.  The site was updated just last Monday, on Dec. 17.  We're at an all-time high rapture index of 187!

So that you don't miss the sordid details (My comments are in red):

01 False Christ:  This one is missing.  I would expect something on Obama, but maybe it got deleted. 
02 Occult:
    There has been two major news events involving witchcraft
    and murder. Are using poor grammar another sign of the apocalypse?
03 Satanism:
    News reports claim there is a surge in demand for exorcists.
    I see career opportunity here
04 Unemployment:
   Unemployment drops to 8.6 percent. 
   Apparently the anti-Christ is doing *something* right
05 Inflation:
    Commodity prices have declined.  See above note  
06 Interest Rates:
    The crisis in Europe has driven down rates. 
07 The Economy
    The debt crisis in Europe is spreading around the world. 
08 Oil Supply/Price
    Gasoline prices post biggest fall in nearly 4 years. See above?
11 Leadership
    Several key areas of prophecy have become over dependent
    on future events. 
12 Drug abuse:
    Colorado and Washington legalized recreational use of 
    marijuana. They're getting the jump on rapture
14 Supernatural:
    There has been an increase in the number UFO sightings.
    This probably has nothing to do with the Geminid meteor shower last week.
15 Moral Standards
    A new poll finds that more couples are living together outside 
    of marriage. 
    Cohabitators, homosexuals and fornicators are the new Axis of Evil TM
17 Crime Rate
   Sandy Hook Elementary School suffers the worst ever shooting. 
   They've had previous shootings? 
18 Ecumenism:
   A key Italian political leader proposed the creation a 
   "palace of religions" in Rome. 
   After all, Christian unity and cooperation are a sure sign that things are about to go south
19 Globalism:
    Economic hardship in Europe has hurt globalism cause. 
    When life gives you lemons....
21 Anti-Semitism
    Even though terrorists in Gaza started the current conflict, 
    Israel is the one being blamed for the civilian deaths. 
    If you accuse Israel of killing people in air strikes you are being antisemitic?
23 Gog (Russia)
   Putin takes lead role in a test Russia's strategic nuclear 
   arsenal, the most comprehensive in 20 years. ...and these people should know.
28 Arms Proliferation
    US global arms sales reach record $66.3B
29 Liberalism:
    The News Media has reached record levels of bias in their 
    coverage of the 2012 political season. 
    Not even Fox News can count-balance this terrible trend.
30 The Peace Process:
     Israel and the Palestinians are not talking to each other. 
     At least they've agreed to exchange rocket fire.      
31 Kings of the East:
    China and Japan agree to directly trade of their currencies.  
33 Beast Government 
    Pinellas County, Fla., students are paying for lunch by 
    waving of their hand over a palm scanner. Just 3 words: Oh. My. God!  
36 Volcanoes:
    Around the world, several volcanoes have been active 
    I wonder which of the 20 currently active volcanoes was the tip-off?
37 Earthquakes:
    Two strong quakes kill 240 people in Iran.
    That's almost as bad as the one in Dec. 26, 2003. 
    I wonder if any of them had to do with school prayer? 
 
The next four have NOTHING to do with the global warming hoax, and EVERYTHING to do with bringing on the apocalypse  
38 Wild Weather:
   A "Derecho" wind storm has caused major damage in the Northest. 
41 Drought: 
    Record Heat is drying out the central U.S. 
44 Food Supply
    High temps in the Midwest has driven up corn prises.
45 Floods
    Massive flooding strikes southern Russia.  

1 comment:

LJL said...

Funniest. Post. Ever. This is a big reason I miss working with you. Totally on point!